Wednesday, February 09, 2011

An Inquiry

half bath inverted
Originally uploaded by Seeking Tao
In a couple of weeks, I am going to see my Taoist Teacher, Wong Loh Sin See.
It’s been a year since I was last with the Teacher, so I was soaking in my morning tub thinking about what I hoped to gain from the coming workshop.
Just after I had satisfactorily clarified my intentions, I heard the Teacher’s voice:
“Patty, what is enlightenment?”

I thought a moment before replying, realizing he had touched a nerve.
“I could give you a definition, an explanation in words.
“But, I don’t know that I know …
what enlightenment feels like to be lived or embodied.”

At least, that was how I was going to finish my sentence.
Instead, I heard what I had just said:

“I don’t know that I know”

This revelation stopped me cold.
Stunned into silence:
I know!

It’s just life as I live it every day.
That’s how it feels.
It’s that simple.

By then, I had melted into tears.
And immediately the mind and commentary kicked in.
“Insights like this are supposed to be met with laughter not tears.”
And I was OK with the “incorrect response,”
as I zipped right on to the next thought, “Now! Can you just let it be?”

… No...
Embodiment can always go deeper.
Going deeper, becoming clearer, gentler, softer – those had been my intentions for the workshop.
What will being clearer be like?

That’s what I don’t know.
That's the mystery and delight of the next moment.

We were both enlightened in the most profound and deep way; we were both fulfilled.
And yet there was [something] that had not risen to the surface to be met.
And that's what had to be seen…
I had to be willing to discover how I was and what deals I had made with myself to overlook this.
And so, it's endless. And vigilance is necessary until the last breath…
Gangaji, Awakening is Endless 


KathyB said...

I listened to the Gangaji interview with Tami Simon a few weeks ago and I had the same reaction... Wow... "vigilance is necessary until the last breath…". No kidding!

The same thing struck me when I listened to Tami's interview with Reginald Ray (Dark Retreat), where he sits in total darkness for 1 month each year. Even for Reggie, all sorts of bizarre childhood things still come up.

"The Buddhist, Tibetan, Tantric point of view is that path is the goal, that there is no end point for humans ever..."

Pat Bralley said...

Gangaji's interview interests me for several reasons - like what's the path or practice after you clearly know "no self"... which I hope to get into a bit later. (once I get through earning a living for the day)
... I'll check out Reginald ray, Thanks.